Migrate / by Deborah Clague

I've always been a person with a plan. A strategy. A blueprint for matters of the heart, mind and soul. So it's unsettling where I now find myself, fighting the ebb and flow of physics and economics in my 29th year, questioning my beliefs, my future, my taste in music and men...unsettling, but also highly intriguing, for I am at a crossroads in the game of life and my choices now will forever inspire/haunt the person I am and the person I am set to become. The last time I felt this sense of urgency for change, good things happened. I feel the stars have aligned and are telling me "it's now or never". So I ask: should I remain in my hometown or move to the place where I actually feel at home? It's a superficial crises that rears its head every few years or so...the dream of relocating to the coast.

Winnipeg will forever remain in my bones. I enjoy it here but the predictability of everyday life has, in a sense, caused me to be complacent on certain things. I can't help but notice how rejuvenated creatively and spiritually I feel after returning from a trip...the excitement of new sights, sounds and tastes. Living in Winnipeg is somewhat like living the reality version of the movie 'Groundhog Day'. You can leave for a day, you can leave for a decade, and upon return will be met with the same ol', same old: sensationalized media reports of being the hard crime capital of Canada, tree building huggers protesting the demolition of every decrepit abandoned structure within the perimeter, and the faint hope that the Jets may return. Maybe. Possibly. Or not. In a way, we live in the past. My areas of choice, British Columbia or Nova Scotia, would provide, if nothing more, a change of scenery; and if nothing less, a much appreciated change of perspective.

That's not to say their magic will never fade either. I'm sure the coffee shops in Vancouver are filled with repetitive discussion concerning the rising cost of living and the drug problems plaguing the city. At the other end of the spectrum in Nova Scotia, the lack of employment opportunity cannot be ignored. But I'm evolving into a nomad. I crave change. I don't have a plan, as yet. And I don't plan on making one anytime soon. The wind will carry me home. Where I should be. Where I need to be. Wherever that is.